Friday, December 8, 2017

Can a relationship survive after cheating?

Can the infidelity-damaged relationship survive? The answer is yes – and no – and it all depends. A host of conditions, qualifications and cross-considerations are infused with the diverse realities of individual lives.

Of course, the trick question is, "How do I know if the relationship is worth saving?" I find that most of my clients already know the answer before they come to my office. But we invest a lot in our relationships, and it's normal to want guidance on a decision as big as breaking up or staying with someone or if you are single you are able to chat with girls online. Here's the catch: I'm not so direct—my job is to steer the conversation and help the couple decide whatever is best for them. But you're not my client, so here's my advice:

My first tip is to stop thinking about cheating in a black-and-white way and instead think of it as points on a spectrum, with flirting on one end and a full-blown, top-secret affair on the other.

Then, ask your partner these questions: Why did you cheat? How did you decide to tell me or keep it secret? Would you make a different choice going forward? Why or how? What has changed?

Although it might feel like a punch in the gut, try to understand exactly why and how the cheating happened. From there you can decide if it seems like it was a good person making a bad choice or a lost person likely to make a string of bad choices. Truly understanding what happened is also the only way to build back trust—which you're going to need if you decide to stay.

Next, you have to ask yourself if this is something you can move past. That doesn't mean you have to forgive your partner or stop being angry. But it does mean you can't start treating him or her like crap as payback, because that's cutting off your nose to spite your face. It's not comfortable to be in a relationship where you're fighting all the time, regardless of whose "fault" it is.

Moving forward also means taking a hard look at your relationship and, instead of blaming your partner, being willing to work on aspects that aren't so great. For some couples, cheating actually brings to the surface issues in the relationship that had been swept under the rug. So it's possible to build a stronger and better relationship after someone has cheated. Yup, I said it.

If, after talking to your partner and being super honest with yourself, you decide to stay together, the next hurdle is telling any friends and family who know about the cheating. (If you didn't tell anyone, great—but you might want to see a therapist to sort out any lingering feelings so they don't set you off later.) This is where shame often kicks in—because we're told that strong people don't put up with cheating, it can be embarrassing to tell loved ones that you're sticking with it. But you know what, find strength in the fact that you're able to trust your own judgment and able to make a decision that is right for you. There is no shame in that.

The problem with the statistics on cheating is that these are just numbers. They don’t tell the complicated story of each relationship and its struggles over time. The numbers don’t know if your partner cheated only once or many times, if he truly regrets cheating or feels no remorse at all, if you have children you want to protect from divorce and if both of you still love each other deeply. So…how can you know whether to trust your spouse again and give him another chance?
There ARE ways to know.

These are 3 Signs That You Can Survive an Affair and Regain Trust in Him Again:

Sign #1 – He cut off all contact with the other woman
If you really want to regain trust in your partner you need to know that his lover is completely out of the picture, even if it’s difficult because the lover is a coworker or a neighbor. If the lover attempts to make contact, your spouse should let you know and discuss what to do about it with you. From now on there must be a complete transparency in your relationship. If your spouse agrees to all of this – It’s a very good sign that you can trust him again and save your relationship.

Sign #2 – He Shows Deep Regret
If your partner takes responsibility and shows deep remorse, it’s a good sign that you can start the healing process of your relationship. In many cases the cheater “uses” infidelity as a way to escape and end the relationship. In these cases it probably means that he doesn’t want to save the relationship at all. He must show real pain and guilt about his actions and bad choices. If they don’t, you have to be careful, it might mean that he will do it again and you will end up on the “broken up” part of cheating statistics.

Sign #3 – He Gives You All the Details
If you were cheated on you probably have dozens of questions running around in your head constantly. You also have obsessive and disturbing images of him with the other woman – these alone can drive you crazy. In order to get rid of the negative thoughts and of the affair images you have to know all the details. Most of the time the affair images running in your mind are much worse than the real details of his affair. If your spouse answers your questions and shares the details with you – It’s a great step towards healing and a good sign that your relationship will survive cheating.

How to Survive an Affair in Your Relationship
The most important aspect in salvaging a relationship after an affair is to do it the Right Way. It’s very common to get sucked into a vicious circle of anger, depression, resentment and obsessive-negative thoughts. Though these feelings are very legitimate, they will stop you from healing your relationship and moving on to a better and happier one. Imagine what would happen in your relationship if you knew….

How to erase the affair images from your mind
How to regain your self-esteem and confidence
How to talk about the details
How to know if he will do it again
Exactly what to do and say to save your relationship after an affair.

Thursday, September 7, 2017

Best 4K TV Boxes for Watching NBA Games


We all have been holding our breaths and patiently waiting for October to start. Not because of Halloween but because one of the best sports seasons is about to start, NBA. We can never ever watch a Golden State Warriors versus Houston Rockets game on a small screen with bad resolution. That would be a sin.

No need to worry about which 4K TV Box you should buy, we have got you all covered. Television has been a great friend for us during NBA seasons but cable always betrays us in the end. We watch our teams win and lose and sometimes we don’t because we had problems streaming the main game. The best Android TV box will make our experiences more vivid and real. You should definitely buy a 4K TV box before the season starts. It would be like buying tickets for your favorite game but cheaper.

WHICH ARE THE BEST ANDROID TV BOXES TO BUY?
The Android TV box market is very vast. An Android TV box is a small set-top box which works on Google’s operating system. This means that you can easily stream content from the internet. Chances are that you have no idea which is or are the best Android TV boxes. Our list is here to guide you.

1) Roku Premiere+
Are you looking for an affordable 4K streaming then this is your best option. This Android TV box costs less than even $83.92. It has a solid HDR performance with a quad-core processor. It is an adept piece of hardware and offers the maximum amount of channels as compared to other streaming Android TV boxes. Roku has a one of a kind universal search function which allows you to search and watch shows and movies from anywhere. It is the agnostic Switzerland of Android TV boxes. You can download content from anywhere-Roku does not care, all it wants is for you to watch your content.

2) Chromecast Ultra
This is a reliable and affordable 4K streaming dongle. Too often, there is a mismatch between a product’s price and how much it is really worth. Thankfully, Chromecast Ultra is not one of those products. It only costs $69 and is three times smaller than its counter parts. It has about 450,000 channels to choose from.

3) Nvidia Shield Android TV
You can play video games really smoothly on Nvidia Sheild. It is a bit pricey if compared to others but it gives a vivid 4K HDR streaming. It costs about $199.99 which is a bit expensive. If you love playing video games and are really invested into it then you should buy this TV box. What really seals the deal for video gamers is that this Android TV box with a controller. This controller syncs up perfectly and can play any number of streaming titles from GeForce Now, Nvidia’s own game-streaming service

Stay tuned in for the NBA season and it would be really easier for you if you bought of these Android TV boxes. If we missed any 4K Android TV boxes that you use, tell us about it in the comment section below.

Monday, July 17, 2017

Which upcoming NBA draft/free agent signings/trades could help the also-rans challenge golden state warriors for NBA title.

The Golden State Warriors sit atop the throne, almost imperious in their position. Almost but not quite. Winning the NBA finals was something that they had to do. Having blown 2016 so spectacularly, there could be no repeat a year later against the same opposition.

Going 3 - 1 up against the Cavaliers brought memories flooding back. If disaster struck once again, the Warriors would have been bracketed with the greatest sporting chokers of all time, putting the ‘86 Red Sox and Greg Norman at the ‘96 Masters to shame; they would become the NBA’s Cubs.

Instead, as with all great champions, they took their setback on the chin, turned up for game 5 of the finals and duly won the series 4 - 1. There had been an authority about their play throughout the post-season and delivering the title had an air of inevitability.

The gap to their rivals seems large. but with the draft, the opportunity arose to see if it was insurmountable yet. We look at which of the franchises came away happier with their business.

LA Lakers

With a win percentage of just .317 in 2016-17, one of the most globally recognizable of sporting franchises needed a good draft and overall, their front office delivered. They had a plan and kept to it. With the number 2 pick, they had an opportunity and it was off-limits in every discussion about trades they had.

Not only that, they used it well with Lonzo Ball, the UCLA Point Guard. Later picks included Villanova shooting guard, Josh Hart, and, Indiana center, Thomas Bryant. The interesting addition to their roster is Utah’s Kyle Kuzma, with his 7’6” arm span has vultures looking on enviously.

Perhaps the best business is offloading Timofey Mozgov but the drafts are the future. Ball is expected to be the future face of the franchise but the highest hopes for the coming season are surely the play-offs.

Boston Celtics

Losing the Eastern Conference final to the Cavs suggests that the Celtics are not far off being genuine contenders. A couple of judicious trades, perhaps pick up a pick. According to ‘sources’, they chased Paul George but they are set to lose out to the Cavs once more.

They lost out to the Timberwolves as well, with Jimmy Butler joining Minnesota on the Thursday night. It left them with Jayson Tatum whose strengths will be fed by Brad Stevens There’s a distinct possibility that the off-season could be underwhelming but Danny Ainge, while not the messiah some claim, is nowhere near as flimsy in planning as his critics believe.

Free agency is their interesting time for the Celtics. With the Cavs and others improving their rosters, can Boston afford not to do well in the remaining deals? Maybe the draft was a big tease and the powers-that-be have a couple of tricks up their sleeve? This may yet be an interesting summer.

Minnesota Timberwolves
Trading Jimmy Butler from Chicago for the number 7 pick, Zach Lavine and Kris Dunne, as well as receiving the number 16 pick, is a formula for a lot of fun. Not necessarily into the finals but the playoffs are a distinct possibility.

Dunne needed a change of scenery after failing to live up to the expectations but Lavine is a costly element in the trade. His departure is something they still need to address; that, they hope, is a future problem when age catches up with him.

The Wolves added Justin Patton from the draft and will be busy with free agency as well. There are still weaknesses to address but one thing seems safe to say: a repeat of last season’s .341 win percentage is not on the cards.

Cleveland Cavaliers & Golden State Warriors

Between the pair of them, last season’s NBA finalists managed one pick in the draft. Golden State bought pick 38 from Chicago and left with Oregon’s Power Forward, Jordan Bell. Cleveland will argue that they are tied up working on a deal to bring Paul George from Indianapolis.

George has been linked with all and sundry but at the moment, is going nowhere. It’s expected that he will move to the Cavs soon, giving an air of respectability to the front office’s work. The two clubs have monopolised the regular and post seasons in recent years. The bookies see no reason why that will change with bookies offering odds of 3 / 5 on the Warriors and 3 / 1 for the Cavs, as of June 29.

When the regular season begins, there is a lot of interest focussed on how the draft picks will fare. Until then, it’s all about deals to be done.