Wednesday, February 5, 2014

DMX To Box George Zimmerman, Avenge The Entire Black Race.

There's weird sh*t, and then there's really weird sh*t that makes you wonder if you're living in some alternate universe. File this under the latter.
Let's get ready to ... mumble. As in, what now, George Zimmerman?

Seems like the former neighborhood watchman has found yet another way to remain in the public limelight.

This time, he'll be stepping into a boxing ring to fight rapper DMX.

Zimmerman said the celebrity boxing match was his idea. Boxing was his hobby, he told Radar Online last month, even prior to the "incident." The incident, of course, is the February 2012 encounter in which he shot dead an unarmed Trayvon Martin, 17. He stood trial for murder, but was acquitted.

"Prior to the incident, I was actually going to the gym for weight loss and doing boxing-type training for weight loss," he told Radar. "A mutual friend put me in contact with Damon and provided me with an opportunity and motivation to get back in shape and continue with my weight loss goals and also be able to help a charity out."

Damon is Damon Feldman, owner of Celebrity Boxing and self-described opportunist, whose claim to fame is putting together bizarre matchups. Think Tonya Harding, Michael Lohan.

He said last week that he was accepting offers for someone to step into the ring for a three-round, pay-per-view fight with Zimmerman.

"The news has been out for an hour and my e-mail is overloaded with 8,000 people wanting to fight George," Feldman told CNN on Thursday.
So we've basically entrusted a damn crackhead with the task of exactly kharmic revenge on behalf of the entire race. Lovely, just lovely. Out of all the rappers we coulda chosen, we had to pick DMX? Really? A guy who's 150lbs soaking wet, which a history of mental problems is gonna beat a 200+ pound killer! guy with MMA training? Damn. Wasn't 50 Cent available? He was once a boxer, and he raps (sometimes). He's probably too rich to care. So how about real rap tough guys like Bumpy Knuckles, Trick Trick, and The Game. They've got plenty of free time on their hands, and Game even has a (somewhat puzzling) Trayvon Martin tattoo. Heck, he was even mistaken for Martin by internet race baiters some. And he asked to do this. Why not Jayceon?

Anyways because Zimmerman hand-picked his opponent, we're stuck with DMX now. And as tough as he might come across, I thinking most of that is macho-posturing and heroin. Mostly the heroin. Need I remind you what happened the last time a macho-posturing rapper stepped into the ring?

Yeah, this could get ugly. Real ugly.

Keep your nose clean, and drink lots of raw eggs, X. The entire race is depending on you.

Question: Is DMX gonna get his clock cleaned by George Zimmerman? What will it mean for Black America when/if he does? Could you think of another rapper who might have been better equipped to handle this?

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