Thursday, July 15, 2010 Guest Post: Condemn This, NAACP!!!

[Editor's Note: I don't have enough time or patience to go in on the NAACP's crusade against the Tea Party. I will, however say that I think they're about a year late on this issue. When's the last time you saw a Tea Party rally? Seems to me like the passing of ObamaCare drove these poor saps back into hiding. Either that or the start of NASCAR season. Anyways, my cyber cuz The Black Snob presents this fine list of other things the NAACP should really be condemning. Show our guest some love you-know-where.]

In light of the NAACP coming out against racist elements in the Tea Party I began to wonder: if the NAACP is going the reactionary, Catholic League route for fighting injustice, why haven't they spoken out on the many other frivolous things that annoy black people? After all, a lot of things annoy me and as a black person I insist they consider the following worthless, symbolic resolutions. The N-word isn't the only thing that needs to metaphorically die!

Other proposed pointless resolutions the NAACP should consider:

NAACP condemns all of hip hop, the Boondocks, your grandpa and Jesse Jackson for STILL using the N-word after they buried it. What part of dead do you people not understand?

NAACP condemns people getting upset over Mel Gibson for saying the N-word. Dead things can't hurt you.

But ...!

NAACP condemns Mel Gibson for using N-word. It's about principle.

NAACP condemns Beyonce and Lady Gaga for convincing impressionable women that a sparkly "onsie" is appropriate club wear. Try pants.

NAACP condemns Michael Steele's foot for always getting in the way of his mouth in the wrong way. The only way Michael Steele's foot should be in his mouth is if it is physically in his mouth, preventing him from saying words.

NAACP condemns VH-1 for giving Chad Ochocinco a crappy, sport-themed version of The Bachelor called "The Ultimate Catch." No one wants to watch that.

NAACP condemns TV One and Donald Trump for giving Omarosa Manigualt-Stallworth a crappy version of The Bachelorette called "The Ultimate Merger." No one wants to watch that either.

[Editor's Note: I'm watching it, and it's halfway entertaining.]

NAACP condemns Twitter for distracting people at work. Y'all know y'all supposed to be working.

NAACP condemns KFC's Double Down for being delicious.

NAACP condemns saggy pants for sagging so much and offending the sensibilities of everyone.

NAACP condemns more people shouting out Lil Wayne than Jesus at this year's BET Awards.

NAACP condemns President Obama for not being angry enough. If Jesse was president SURELY he would have got us some damn reparations by now and found a trumped up reason to throw Glenn Beck in prison. Or at least created a Department of Race Relations where we could all get jobs and a nice new headquarters. Really. Where's our new headquarters, Obama?

NAACP condemns people who hate on them, because y'all are just jealous. Haters.

NAACP condemns you because you won't join and stop them from condemning things that are meaningless. You're a turrible black person.

Just turrible.

Question: What's your read on the NAACP condemning the racist elements of the Tea Party? What else should they be condemning while they're at it?

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