Wednesday, January 6, 2010's 2010 Predictions.

New Year's Resolutions are for punks. Let's face it, if you need wait until January 1st and announce to the world you intentions to finally join Bally's and lose that gut, you probably aren't gonna make it. I would really like to permanently remove that word from the English Language.

I'm more about predictions anyway. They're more fun to make, and if you're wrong, who cares? If you're right, you look like a genius, and I need not remind you, in 2009, I looked like a genius. Thus, I'm once again staring into the AB Crystal Ball and giving you a boatload of various predictions for the Dub-Dime.

* Barack Obama will finally wake up to the reality that the GOP is just a bunch of obstructionists who would still hate on him even if he C-Walked across the Potomac. He'll finally find ways of controlling the message, paint these guys as the jackasses they are, and help the Dems hold their majority in the Senate, and a narrow lead in the House next Fall.

* The Healthcare bill will finally pass in March with the Public Option included.

* Cap and Trade legislation will die a swift, definitive, and necessary death.

* Unemployment will unexpectedly stabilize under 10% for much of the year, but it won't inch down toward 8% at any point. This will continue to be a thorn in the President's side, even as other sectors of the economy rebound as expected.

* A major scandal regarding the use of Stimulus Funds in a Northern state will dominate the news cycles for several weeks. Sex and money will be at the root of this unfortunate, and damaging controversy.

* The US will invade Yemen, bringing the total number of war's we're conducting at once to 3. Talk of re-instituting the military draft will be revived.

* A high profile Democrat facing re-election will have a notable sex scandal erupt, and this will end his bid.

* The GOP/TeaBagger friction will cost the party a couple of seats as its infighting for ideological purity leads to wasted resources, split votes, and an unexpected Democratic win.
* The Kentucky Wildcats will win the NCAA Basketball Championship in Indianapolis. John Wall will leave school early, as expected, and become the #1 overall draft pick of the New York Knicks.

* The Minnesota Vikings will win the Super Bowl, and Brett Favre will sign a two-year contract extension.

* The San Antonio Spurs will shock the world (and the Lakers) and capture the NBA title.
* Although rap music sales will continue to plummet, a new star will be born with Nicki Minaj becomes the first female rapper in years to actually move units.

* Every single black themed talkshow/sitcom currently on the air will be cancelled by June.

* Although it's more sports than "entertainment", Tiger Woods will return to golf by the Summer, win a major tournament, and announce his intention to marry one of his longtime jumpoffs.
Question: Okay, those are my predictions, show me yours.

blog comments powered by Disqus

Post a Comment

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.