Monday, September 14, 2009

AB.com NewsBriefs - Negroes & TeaBaggers Behaving Badly Edition.

Yeah, I'm busy today. Here's a few notes on a few things.

Lyin' On Your Crowd Size - So, the TeaBaggers made it to DC this weekend, and thankfully for all parties involved, I was out of town for a wedding. As if you needed another reason to dislike these folks, witness the fact that they referred to their rally as "The March On Washington". Really, TeaBaggers, "The March On Washington", really?!? Are you serious? MLK is crying inside. How about Million Moron March? That works better.



Quite comically, the protestors began throwing out all sorts of ludicrous crowd estimates, at one point even suggesting that the rally drew about 2 Million people, and completely fabricating an ABC News story to backup their claims. Folks, I was there on that cold January day for Inauguration. I saw 2 Million people with my own eyes. That TeaBag crowd, my friends, couldn't fill up RFK, let alone FedEx Field. The organizers later relented and gave out more realistic crowd numbers like 75k, which seem more on point. But what's a few million here or there when you're pointlessly protesting tax hikes, although you actually already got a tax cut from Obama? Oh, and those horsecrap covered "Bury ObamaCare With Kennedy" signs? Really classy, guys. Really classy. TeaBaggers, FTL.

BTW, I really, really hate throwing terms like "racist" out there, but damn. Look at this set of photos from Flikr and tell me if this wasn't FreakNik for Crackers. Not na'er Negro, or other person of color in this entire crowd, and this took place in Chocolate City.

Serena Loses It - I missed this in real time, but dang, c'mon Serena, I know Oracene and Richard taught you better than this? I know the foot fault was iffy, but you ain't have to go all Compton on that poor little Asian lady. This looked like an incident in a bodega, not Arthur Ashe Stadium.



I don't know what's worse: losing $10k over something like this, or losing to some random Belgian chick who looks just like John Gruden? You tell me.

Kanye Acts Like An A-Hole... Again - Come on, Yeezy, your mama taught you better than this. I don't know Taylor Swift from Stromile Swift, but jumping onstage and robbing this poor girl of her moment is just wrong on so many levels. Naturally, the folks at Viacom have shut down any YouTubbage of this event, but here's a sorta funny mashup.



Ok, now that was funny. But for the record, Kayne owes this young lady a real apology. That was a true d-bag move.

Happy Trails, Mike. Don't Let The Door Hit You... - Michael Jordan finally was enshrined in the Basketball Hall Of Fame this past weekend. Never one to state a non-commercially advantageous opinion on record, Jordan surprised those in attendance by taking some parting shots at the haters who made him the legend he is. He started off classy, and actually cried a bit at the beginning, but towards the end of his speech, things took a turn for the worse.



I mean, come on Mike, let it go. We already know the whole "cut from his high school team" thing is nothing but an urban legend meant to give a ruthlessly unlikable guy some down-to-earth self-deprecation, all in the name of motivating kiddies to beg their parents for $200 shoes so they too can "be like Mike". But the digs at the Bulls ownership, Isaiah Thomas, Larry Bird, "the media", and said high school basketball coach is a wee bit much. And damn, I know you got you a young, tender Brazilian jumpoff now, but how about thanking Juanita for letting you cavort with groupies nationwide and never exposing that "family guy" nonsense you peddled to sell shoes and Gatorade your lovely kids? Whatever happened to gracious retirement speeches? And yeah, it might shock some of ya'll because I'm a UNC Tarheel and Washington Wizards fan, but I've never, evar, been crazy about MJ. This speech just showed why, once again.

Question: Did you even know about the TeaBagger March On Washington? Is the term "March On Washington" sacred, or is it just me? Was Serena wrong? Why is Kanye such a douchebag? Did you wanna be Like Mike?!?

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