Friday, January 16, 2009

Notorious Is In Theaters Today. You Goin'?!?

Boy, you know you're gettin' old when they're making movies about stuff you technically "lived through". Much like the upcoming Last Dragon remake[1], Hollywood is putting it's mitts on a piece of my adolescent culture.

I'll admit, the more I see of this movie, the more I'm bracing myself for the possibility that it could might suck. Royally.

Angela Bassett as Voletta Wallace? Derek Luke as Puff Daddy? This "Gravy" cat as B.I.G.? Naturi from 3LW as Lil' Kim? Anthony Mackie as Tupac? Who casted this sh*t, Stevie Wonder?!?

I have to admit, on paper, it don't sound too good.

It's possible the expectations (ie: mine) are simply too high and there's no way this movie could possibly capture the essence of Christopher Wallace. Where's the lazy eye? The perpetual stuffy-nosed voice? The limpy walk? This just don't look right.

That said, I'm going to take some penitentiary chances and go watch this jawn in the hood' theater to-nite. PG County stand up! Just don't steal my car if you need a ride to The Blvd @ Cap Ctr. I know this ain't the safest thing, so pray for me. The audience may be more entertaining than the movie. It wouldn't be the first time. Sometimes a hood movie audience can save a dud. Malibu's Most Wanted and Little Man, I'm talkin' bout you.

Needless to say, a very special edition of AverageBro Goes To The Movies is coming next week if you wanna wait for my expert opinion. I'll take one for the team and waste the $40 on my own. Make that $20, because a hood movie deserves hood snacks. I will hit the corner sto' and roll into my local AMC with a gang of LemonHeads and some Checkers under my bubblegoose.

Cause you know how we do. It's all good Baby Babaaaaaayyyy.

Question: What do ya'll think? Is this worth the $40 or will you watch one of the 100 copies on the web cop the bootleg? Do you remember where you were the day you heard Ready To Die? Do you remember where you were the day you heard Biggie died?

[1] The rumor mill has Rihanna playing Laura Charles and Chris Brown as Bruce Leroy. Jesus please, NOOOOOO!!!

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