You know him. You hate him. You might could be him, but I pray you're not cause that would be really triflin' on so many different levels.
That's right party people, I'm talkin' about fonky assed co-workers.
Every office has that guy whose breath, armpits, or assorted nether-regions smell like hot trash on a hundred degree day. And my office is no exception. We actually have two of them though.
The first guy is named Dikembe[1]. He is from Nigeria, and smells like he hasn't bathed since he left the Motherland, which wasn't exactly yesterday. His feet are the stereotypical "jumping jacks in a bag of Gold Medal" that you come to expect of some of our sistren and brethren. Was that mildly xenophobic? Sure. But you should see the Mount St. Helens level of ash on this cat's ankles. He needs to take a few baths in Eucerin.
Worse, Deke's breath is legendarily bad, but he (much like Office MotorMouth Stanley) is pretty good as his technical niche, which means sometimes you can't avoid going to visit his office if you really need the answer to a question. And unfortunately for me, since his area of expertise is one I know little about, this means I'm down the hall at his place more than I'd like. I always emerge with the desired answers, and far fewer nose hairs.
Perhaps worse is Pfong[2], another co-worker who seems to have no concept of his personal hygeine or lack thereof. Again, I know I'm toeing the line of xenophobia yet again here, and I'm aware some people's religious or cultural customs might be at play. But still, how can you not smell your own ass? I know he can. And since he can, how can he not be completely repulsed to the point of exhaustion. I can literally smell this cat the moment he pulls into the parking garage.
Even Dikembe walks past his office and is like "what the f*ck was that smell?".
Unlike the first in this series, I don't really have any point in posting this one, so consider the question merely a suggestion, while I duck outside for some fresh air.
Question: How do you typically deal with co-workers who have less than stellar personal hygeine?
More WorkPlace 101 [AB.com]
[1] Not his real name.
[2] Not his real name either. I love my Day Job and my home. I'd prefer to keep both.
Monday, June 30, 2008
WorkPlace 101: The Stankin' Co-Worker
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What up AB?
Had a couple of incidences of co-workers who just came to work wrong. I treated them like I woulda treated problems with the Eye, The R-ah and the Ess - Only deal with them when necessary and did not look for no problems. Dealt with them when I had to and then kept it moving. It was not beneath me to hold my breath when dealing with them. I had one co-worker who liked to think as herself as Ms. Keepin' It Real and said something to one of the ladies who had an odor. To say the offending party went off would be an understatement. And did it in the middle of the office so as to put any others on notice who dared to question her that they could get some too. I felt bad for Ms. KIR once the chick finished with her but it was hilarious.
Were these two soooo bad that you had to take time out from work on Monday morning to blog about them?
ROTFLMAO...
then you excuse yourself for some air, lol.
Well, it's hard to tell people stuff like that, and it'd be crushing, perhaps, if you even remotely tried to drop hints at them. Sadly, the best way I could see is to befriend them (which I know you're not about to do) and then use the friend platform from which to tell them as a friend what's up with them.
Excuse me while I go and get some Chipotle for lunch...
JLL
You ain't right, AverageBro! You ain't right! But you might need to do a walk-by with Febreze. Just walk past their desk and start spraying them MFs!!!! LOL!!!!!!
What I do is make a little care package, body wash or soap, a cute little wash cloth, some baby wipes, a toothbrush and toothpaste and deodorant and put it all in a cute little basket and leave it on their desk or outisde the office door. Leave a little note stating that they've won some little contest that you and a few co-workers have made up. Or it can be totally anonymous with just their name.
If they don't get the point, then all the help in the world isn't going to change them and you just need to invest in some Vick's vapor rub mentholatum and before you go see the person dab a little under your nose. It works with dfead bodies for the cops and FBI.
Sooooo not right...but I feel ya!
Well at least you were honest about the xenophobia. When it comes to co-workers who have some body odor (there a particular one in a former workplace, very sweet of a lady but gosh, a foul smell otherwise), I maintain a few inches apart (more than normal) that is respectible but still shows I don't want to faint.
Also, another trick I tried was keeping very fragrant lotion around (all kinds of mints), I normally reached for it when the said co-worker comes into my office to envelope the room. That way she thinks I'm just putting lotion on my hands but actually I'm masking the odor.
I placed a tin of Altoids prominently on my desk, but the person didn't get the hint. Fortunately he's since moved to another department.
If their respective odors bother you so much that it makes approaching them and performing your job uncomfortable, the best solution would be to speak to a supervisor (if you have one) or someone who can approach them privately and explain the situation in a diplomatic, sensitive manner with minimun offense and embarrasement. Some people are really not aware that they have an odor problem. Also remember that karma is a boomerang and one day you may need someone to approach you about a matter with sensitivity, so always do unto others.
There's a guy in our office who literally forced everyone out of the office with some rancid Vietnamese dish he cooked in the microwave... holy hell. I have no idea how you could get within 30ft of that stuff, nevermind EAT it. He did though, and we all worked from home. The next day, Human Resources asked him not to bring anymore of it into the office.
OMG AB this is so funny. In college that same dude, "Dikembe" was in love with this girlfriend of mine. He wanted to take her back to Togo to marry her. She couldn't get past the ashy feet let alone the B.O. (She tried, cause homeboy was super wealthy..but it was all too much for her. LOL!)
And I feel you AB, how can someone not smell themselves? But I swear these people are totally oblivious. Today at work, I actually got some bleach and cleaned the woman's rest room because I had to use it. My co- worker was like, "what's wrong"? I said "the bathroom stinks". She said "what does it smell like"? I said" ass". True story, happened today. I kid you not.
I don't actually have a sense of smell... medical condition. The wife loved it when our kids were in diapers, and she eats garlic and onions with no fear now. :)
Hello there...
I hate to say this but I worked in an office that had this problem....coworkers got together and started leaving little sample bottles of mouthwash and little samples of deodorant on this guy's desk...day after day...and after about three weeks of getting the products...the funk situation was actually starting to be addressed...
Sometimes you just have to leave some subtle hints...some people don't really KNOW that others can smell them....
OK, okay...I'm just tryin' to be nice about it...
Peace, blessings and DUNAMIS!
Lisa
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